It occurred to me as I was dressing my second child yesterday that life certainly has changed quite a bit since
having children. Metaphorically speaking, once arriving to work, now instead of simply turning on my computer and beginning the day, each day begins more like being tasked with having to take apart my computer and put it back together. But even that is an oversimplification; it’s more like I’ve got to wrestle a mutant computer to the ground that is trying to escape my grasp at every opportunity. Once subdued the computer will only stop shaking and gyrating with a trade magazine of some sort to read. In this case, my computer wants to read “Hippos Go Bezerk,” ironically mirroring this daily fiasco.
Once I’ve cleaned out any leaking fluids or “computer grease” it’s on to repackaging the unit. With power strips, plugs and T1 wires flying everywhere my computer repeatedly tries to reboot without authorization as I slip a onesie over its head and fight to slide its wires back into place through the arm holes and snap the bottom around its main “vent.” As I reach for the computer cover, a striped rainbow sweater with a flower, the computer lurches up and bolts from my workstation. With my coworker staring, I dive after the unit only to fall flat on my face. My second computer console takes the opportunity to jump on my back and ride me like a horse, complete with slaps on my back and bouncing up and down. The semi-dressed unit has now noticed I am in a prone position and decides to ride along with her brother, but on my head while screaming, “yippee!, yippee!”
I never had this problem with my old computer!